Monday, August 8, 2011

Strolling Down Memory Corridor...


Some favorite D&D moments:

-Psionically Blasting an evil PC Wizard's familiar during an encounter with Mind Flayers, and affecting him with Dipsomania.  It really doesn't get any better than role-playing an alcoholic Quasit!

-Hearing the dying cry of  Alremas the Evil Monk, "See you in Hell!" after severing both his karate-chopping arms with a Vorpal Sword.  Even better?  Rounding a corner in the Iron City of Dis in Hell, years and XP levels later, to be confronted by an oddly familiar-looking guy in an armless kimono, who pointed a scraggly toe at my Dwarf and said, "YOU!!!"  Our epic second combat ended with my character staggering away from his inert body with two HP... but then the sonovabitch jumped up from Feigning Death and killed me with a spinning roundhouse kick in the back!

-In one of my earlier DMing attempts, the Party fled from a riverside encounter with angry tribesmen, rafted downriver, then asked if they were being followed.  "No, they don't have missile weapons,  nor apparently a boat or raft."  "What are they doing?"  "Jumping up and down on the dock, and yelling in frustration!"  "Really?... I Fireball them."  Killed them all, and taught me to be more mindful of distance and range!

-Rexx the Cleric was handed from player to player as members left/joined our group, and saved the Party countless times... until we foolishly decided to climb a glacier en masse, without any scouting.  We reached a huge cavern entrance, and just stood there, admiring the view, I guess, until the entire party made it up to the ledge.  Then the lurking White Dragon surprised us all with an icy blast, killing Rexx and half the party before anyone even got to roll initiative!

-When it was my turn to unleash a White Dragon on the party, I did so as they were sailing across open water.  I don't know what would have happened if the Party had fled below deck, but the Dragon made a pass, saw lots of foolish humans milling about on a tiny deck, each loaded with shiny stuff, and decided to attack.  He made three more passes, unleashing his BW each time, while the PCs remained huddled together, trying in vain to successfully spellcast, and firing largely ineffective missile attacks, until the entire craft was encased in ice, which the Dragon (presumably) landed on afterward, and leisurely began picking apart for tasty moresels and treasure!

-Getting angry with the party for not paying attention, and deciding to let their inattentiveness and "fooling around" take its toll...  An unlocked dungeon door opened onto complete darkness, a "void dimension" in which time was suspended.  Perhaps I hadn't been challenging them, I can't recall, but when asked what was beyond the door, I said, "Apparently nothing; its completely dark," the ENTIRE PARTY decided to enter the room(?) anyway!  "OK, everyone is trapped in a dimensional void where time is at a standstill."  Silence, as the reality set in... "Everybody roll up new characters, we'll start again at the surface entrance, and maybe the new party will discover your old characters as they explore."  ...Eventually, they did just that, but for months afterward, any empty room described as containing "Nothing" was met with cautious inquiries of, "Nothing, or Nothingness?"

-After defeating a Remorhaz near the entrance to the Glacial Rift of the Frost Giant Jarl, discovering a Ring of Wishes, and after much deliberation beyond earshot of the DM, declaring, "I Wish for all magical items within a 100 mile radius to be arranged neatly on the floor of this ice cavern, right now!"   The DM's absolute refusal was met with all manner of outraged argument (including, "We'll still go on with tonight's adventure - just to kill everything"), until he finally said, "No.  There isn't any good reason for me to deny this, but the answer is still no.  Because I'm the DM, that's why!"

-Inspired by The Hobbit, I placed a Magic Ring in a largely unused dungeon corridor, just simply laying there in plain sight, waiting to be picked up.  An inordinate amount of Real Time was spent trying to cope with this.  Cautious investigation revealed that it was magical, but no traps, illusions, or evil were revealed.  Theories were advanced ("It's cursed!"), arguments ensued ("Just sitting there, without any guardian?  No way!"),  and the party actually decided to WALK AWAY without picking it up!  Someone eventually went back and scooped it up, and when I was later asked to please just explain this encounter, even if the answer couldn't be considered "character knowledge", no one would believe me when I said, "I dunno... maybe some other adventurer just dropped it there by accident!"  "Bullshit!  What's REALLY going on?"





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