Monday, December 1, 2014

End of Session Checklist

Because I always forget something, when we wrap it up at 2:00AM!

End of Session Checklist
Where on the map did we end (room #)?
What time of the day, in game?
Any Spells in effect?
Heal/Rest yet?
Treasure counted/divvied?
All XP accounted for?
Status of PCs/Party? (current HP, Spells, rations, ammo…)
Any plans for next session?
Can all Players make next game?
Any good ideas during play which I didn't write down?

Friday, August 8, 2014

Talisman of the Traptripper

Magical gimcrack with these effects, when dealing with 'Traps' only, whether Magical, or Mechanical:
- if there is a Save to determine full/half damage, it is bettered to 'half/none'
- if there is No Save to avoid &/or lessen damage/effects (effect is Automatic), a Standard Save is granted, resultant effects as per DM
- all 'Saves vs Traps' are at +2

Also, the bearer is affected with a specific delusion, and believes himself an expert at finding and disarming traps, and will insist on being the first to search for and attempt to deactivate any suspected traps, although in reality he is no better or worse at such endeavors than the average layman.  (I usually allow a 1 in 6 chance for your average adventurer to find/identify mechanical traps, and another 1 in 6 to deactivate/disarm, failure meaning the trap has been triggered.)

{for 'Tarkas Traptripper', damage dealer/taker extraordinaire, and all-around quality adventuring companion}

Wednesday, August 6, 2014

Brought to you by Prescott Pharmaceuticals

From a list of Stephen Colbert's  Prescott Pharmaceuticals Side Effects
...sponsored by Baphomet

A Good List of Bad Things, as a result of... (d8)
1. Spoiled Food
2. Xeno Plague
3. Mutation
4. Evil Curse
5. Artifact Stuff
6. Tomb Glyphs
7. Bad Drugs
8. Spores, Dude

Eighty-two Fun Effects, plus some filler to round out a d%.  Game effects as per DM
1. Abdominal Migration
3. An Inability to Breathe on Weekends
4. Ankle Bearding
5. Aortal Collapse
6. Arby’s Mouth
7. Argyle Pattern Baldness
8. Armpit Homunculus
9. Autonomous Nipple Syndrome
10. Bone Sporking
11. Braintooth
12. Capillary Yogurt
13. Firebones
14. DIS (Dissolving Intestine Syndrome)
15. Dry Mouth
16. Eye Curdling
17. Eyearrhea
18. Eyesplosions
19. Facial Corkboarding
20. Fallopian Tapeworm
21. Flunamis
22. Genital Migration
23. Gopherism
24. Hair Swelling
25. Hairy Uvula
26. Honey Nut Areolas
27. Hungry Hungry Hipbones
28. Increased Appetite
29. Increased Risk of Vampire Attack
30. Ingrown Testicle
31. Involuntary Blowhole
32. Involuntary Narnia Adventures
33. Knee Transference
34. Lactose Addiction
35. Late Onset Albinoism
36. Lou Ferrignose
37. Lungfire
38. Massive Weight Gain
39. Mild Hulkism
40. Mind of Mencia
41. Minor Heart Explosions
42. Monkeylung
42. Multibrow
43. Nostril Inversion
49. Outgrown Testicle
50. Permanent Blindness
51. Phantom Hand Syndrome
52. Pituitary Ferns
53. Precocious Kidney
54. Prolonged Erections*
55. Puckerlung
56. Pulmonary Weevils
57. R.E.O. Speedlung
58. Rage
59. Rectal Frosting
60. Re-Emergence of the Umbilical Cord
61. Restless Torso Syndrome
62. Rocky Mountain Oysterism
63. Runaway Gums
64. Scrotal Bassoon
65. Scruffula
66. Severe Weight Loss
67. Siamese Nipples
68. Skeletal Xylophoning
69. Speaking In Tongues
70. Spontaneous Mertail
71. Spontaneous Pregnancy
72. Steven Tyler Lip
73. Subcutaneous Funyuns
74.Testicular Cranberrying
75. Testicular Testicularization
76. Thoracic Geysers
77. Urethral Knotting
78. Vein Seizures
79. Ventricular Funk
80. Vivid Dreams of Self-Cannibalization
81. Warlock Hump
82. X-Ray Hearing
83-93. ROLL TWICE, then Save to determine whether Player or DM gets to chose one
94-98. ROLL TWICE, sucks for you
99. CHRONIC MALADY, roll again and add effect each day, until dead
00. ROLL AGAIN, Effect is Infectious, and can be transferred to another being by contact with affected area, Save Negates

* But Not Where You’d Hope

Monday, May 26, 2014

A Dozen Magic Items, Why Not?

1. Medallion of the Berserking Bear; if wearer reaches negative HP, goes into Berserk rage and attacks nearest opponent. Bonus of +2 TH, Damage, Initiative, but still loses 1 HP/rnd and immediately falls dead at -10 HP

2. Potion of Wing & a Prayer; magnificent angelic wings and halo appear, effects as per Prayer Spell, and Flight, for 1 turn + 1 rnd/lvl, 'Good' Guys only, please

3. Ogre Powder; Magic Dust which grants equivalent of 18/00 or 19 STR -whatever-  when inhaled, dur. 2d6 rnds, 1d4+2 doses/pouch, must rest for one full turn after effects wear off

4. Living Rope; a rope which can understand and obey simple verbal commands, be made to slither, climb, knot, secure, etc, is if alive, like a snake or worm.  Moves far too slowly to be used to attack or ensnare.  Rope cannot defy gravity, but can climb vertically up to one half its length.  Must consume a (normal, organic) rope of equal length 1/mo, like a king snake eating a corn snake, at a rate of 10'/hr

5. Potion of Suicide Clones; causes 1d4 mini-clones to 'bud' on the body of the imbiber, ea costs 1HP to produce.  Within 1 turn the fawning, grotesque 6" charicatures detach, and will follow simple commands until they shrivel and die after 24 hrs.  Only form of attack is to get really angry and hurl themselves onto a target and explode for 1d4 damage, which is, of course, a one-time-only kinda deal

7. Howard's Signet Ring; adorned only with the raised initials H.P.  (backwards, reversed)  One additional HD, as appropriate to system, is rolled ea day, and the result is added to HP for that day.  Simple, and dearly loved

8. Cuneiform Codex; heavy slab of basalt with twisting, animated hieroglyphs engraved upon it, committing to read it for 12hrs, uninterrupted, followed by a full rest, grants reader the ability to Read &Write any one language (or similar system) of their choice.  Learn 'Bullywug' in a Day!

9. The Green Cream; when applied to any living tissue, imparts a greenish tinge, permits photosynthetic healing, ea hr spent in sunshine Heals 1d4 HP, lasts 24hrs, 2d4 applications/crock

10. Quicksilver Capsule; appears to be a metallic jellybean, when swallowed, take 1d4 damage, and be overcome by fatigue and nausea for 1 turn, whereupon certain Spells already cast that day are restored as if they had not been expended.  The total # of Spell Levels regained is equal to XP Level.  One specific Spell of Player's choice  may be regained, the remainder are determined randomly

11. Philosopher's Rod; transmutes a quantity of metal no greater than one cubic foot into a metal of greater value, according to this progression: iron/steel<copper<silver<gold<platinum
Only affects a single item; one lock on a wooden chest, a sword, a portion of a set of standard donjon jail bars, one burial mask, etc.  Req. touch, or successful TH at +1, 3d4 charges

12. Silver Whistle; summons a Ghostly Hound, which must be fed some kind of reasonably edible meat, and will then stand watch, in one area, for up to 12 hrs.  Detects Invisible, Concealed by smell, cannot be Surprised (except possibly by Teleport or Phasic Travel) is incorporeal, cannot track or attack, but will warn of any approach or intrusion

Friday, May 23, 2014

Chewy Mummy

Magicked Tiny (12") Jade Sarcophagus is Cursed to Paralyze, and also place into an indefinite Stasis, anyone touching it; the victim has a chance to avoid this if they can answer a Riddle of DM's choice.  Tell the Players that only this PC knows it,slipping the Player the Riddle on a piece of scrap,  and they cannot reveal it or ask for help from anyone.  Their answer must be written privately on the scrap and returned to the DM.  If the answer is incorrect, they will assume cross-armed Mummy posture, clutching the sarcophagus to their chest, utter the Riddle aloud, and the Curse will take effect.  Only way to end Paralysis is for another to voluntarily touch the thing, being aware of the consequences, of their own will, whereupon the Curse is transferred to the new victim, or by consuming the mini-mummy inside, which tastes like spicy chicken jerky.  Sarcophagus will only open if Riddle is answered.  Eating the mummy is probably bad for you, too...

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Chose the Form of the Destructor! (d12)

What did you do, Ray?!!

"Subcreatures!  Gozer the Gozerian, Gozer the Destructor, Volguus, Zildrohar, The Traveler, has come! Choose and perish!"

Well, now you've done it.  Save vs Mental Spells, or Roll a d12 to determine what form pops into your head (from some near-forgotten childhood tale, or elsewhere).  If everyone makes the Save, the Form will be chosen by the DM.

1. The classic Stay-Puft Golem.   Deceptively innocuous looking, massively huge, dangerously viscous, highly flammable (no Save/dbl damage vs. fire)
2. A large and moving Torb.  Much worse than the immobile variety, for obvious reasons
3. A giant Slor, its gullet like a roaring furnace, enough to make a Balrog jealous
4. The last creature which caused a successful Fear among the Party
5. The last creature which slew a Party member
6. The worst Thing on the local Random Encounter table
7. A Shoggoth
8. A Spawn of Shog-Gnargoroth, possessed of odd magic/mutant abilities
9. The goateed Evil Twin of the most powerful Party member
10. Roll on Dungeon Lvl X table
12. Players get to vote on an entry from this table